Friday, January 19, 2018

Honoring Limitations During Cancer Treatment

Cancer treatment and writing don't go together. At least, they didn't for me. I thought I'd keep up my blogs, write, and submit while traveling five days a week, managing side effects, juggling my schedule, etc. Workarounds aren't new to me, so I didn't see a problem.

Well...  my hubris didn't last. I began to nap daily. Brain fog (an occasional visitor in my life before) stayed all day, multiple days a week. Side effects whisked me away to the bathroom fifteen times within twenty hours. Poetry didn't flee me completely, but it was erratic and strained.

I felt so terrible about letting my blogs go (especially this one). I'd berate myself for not being there for my readers. "Workarounds," I reminded myself as I dozed off. It didn't matter that I was busy saving my life so I could continue the work I do. Nope. All I knew was work wasn't getting done.

"Honor your limitations," I tell people around me a lot. But I never apply it to myself, regardless of what I'm going through. Not without a pile of guilt, anyway.

I'm feeling more like myself these days, though I'm not at 100%. In February, I find out if my cancer is gone. It's also the month submissions are open for mentor applications for The H.U.P. Mentor Program, something I've wanted to bring to our community for a very long time.
Each time life is upended, you must re-examine what you need and honor it. You don't have to thrive every moment you exist. Surviving is enough. It ensures you're still here to do whatever you planned on doing tomorrow... and beyond.

1 comment:

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